THE NAR-ANON FAMILY GROUP
 

The Family Group is primarily for you who know or have known a feeling of desperation concerning the addiction problem of someone very near to you. We have traveled that unhappy road too, and found the answer with serenity and peace of mind.

When you come into the Family Group, you are no longer alone but among true friends who understand your problem as few others could. We will respect your confidence and anonymity; we know you will respect ours. We hope to give you the assurance that no situation is too difficult to be bettered and no unhappiness too great to be overcome.

Our program, which is not a religious one but a spiritual way of life, is based on the 12 suggested steps of Narcotics Anonymous. We have found that the working of these steps will bring the solution to practically any problem. We urge you to take this program and its 12 steps seriously. It has been helpful to us as the Narcotics Anonymous program is to the addict. We only ask for the wisdom and courage to see ourselves as we really are, to do something about ourselves with the help of a Higher Power and for the grace to release our addicts with love and cease trying to change them. Keep an open mind and attend as many meetings as possible. Feel free to ask questions and enter into the discussions. You will soon make new friends and will feel very much a part of the group.

With the understanding that addiction is a disease, and the realization that we are powerless over it as well as over other people's lives, we are ready to do something useful and constructive with our own. Then and only then can we be of any help to others.
 


EXPLANATION OF THE NAR-ANON PROGRAM
 

  1. Nar-Anon is for your recovery. We learn to focus on ourselves, not on the addict.

  2. Nar-Anon is a spiritual program, not a religious one. We accept the idea that there is a higher power that is bigger and wiser than us, that we can turn to for help.

  3. Nar-Anon welcomes and gives comfort to newcomers. Newcomers receive a special packet of materials and phone list at their first meeting.

  4. Nar-Anon knows that drug addiction is a disease (the American Medical Association recognized drug addiction as a disease in 1955.) The disease is progressive and incurable. Nar-Anon helps relatives and friends of addicts whether or not the addict continues to use.

  5. Nar-Anon knows we are not responsible for the drug addiction. We did not cause it, we cannot control it, and we cannot cure it. If we do not learn how to cope with drug addiction, we will contribute to the disease.

  6. Nar-Anon members learn to detach from the addict but we continue to love them. We mind our own business.

  7. Nar-Anon does not give advice. We share our experience, strength, and hope. Our common bond is that we all know someone whose drug abuse bothers us. Sooner or later we each hear our own story and learn to laugh again. We know it will get better.

  8. Most Nar-Anon groups in New Jersey use Al-Anon's One Day at a Time book. When we read it, we substitute drugs for alcohol, addict for alcoholic. We cannot change the past or predict the future. We learn to live -- Just for Today.

  9. The Nar-Anon program is based on its twelve steps, twelve traditions, twelve concepts, its slogans, and the serenity prayer.

  10. Nar-Anon is a living program. We learn to change our attitudes. This cannot be done in a day or a week or a month. We keep coming back; we want to keep our own recoveries.

  11. Nar-Anon provides a path to serenity and peace of mind even if the drug situation does not change.

  12. Nar-Anon believes in sponsors. A sponsor is someone in a Nar-Anon group with whom a member identifies and develops rapport. We discuss personal problems with our sponsors between meetings.


THE TWELVE STEPS OF NAR-ANON FAMILY GROUPS
 

  1. We admitted we were powerless over the addict, and that our lives have become unmanageable.

  2. Came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

  3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.

  4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

  5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.

  6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.

  7. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.

  8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all.

  9. Made direct amends to such people except when to do so would injure them or others.

  10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.

  11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.

  12. Having had a spiritual awakening as a result of these Steps, we tried to carry this message to others and to practice these principals in all our affairs.


THE TWELVE TRADITIONS OF NAR-ANON FAMILY GROUPS
 (Our group experience suggests that the unity of the Nar-Anon Family
Groups depends upon our adherence to these traditions.)
 

  1. Our common welfare should come first; personal progress for the greatest number depends on unity.

  2. For our group purpose there is but one authority - a loving God as He may express Himself in our group conscience. Our leaders are but trusted servants; they do not govern.

  3. The relatives of addicts, when gathered for mutual aid, may call themselves a Nar-Anon Family Group, provided that as a group, they have no other affiliation. The only requirement for membership is that there be a problem of addiction in a relative or friend.

  4. Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other Nar-Anon Family Groups, or N.A. as a whole.

  5. Each Nar-Anon family group has but one purpose: to help families of addicts. We do this by practicing the Twelve Steps of Nar-Anon ourselves, by encouraging and understanding our addicted relatives, and by welcoming and giving comfort to families of addicts.

  6. Our family groups ought never to endorse, finance or lend our name to any outside enterprise, lest problems of money, property and prestige divert us from our primary spiritual aim; but although a separate entity, we should always cooperate with Narcotics Anonymous.

  7. Every group ought to be fully self-supporting, declining outside contributions.

  8. Nar-Anon Twelfth Step work should remain forever non-professional, but our service centers may employ special workers.

  9. Our groups, as such ought never to be organized, but we may create service boards or committees directly responsible to those they serve.

  10. The Nar-Anon Family Groups have no opinion on outside issues; hence our name ought never be drawn into public controversy.

  11. Our public relations policy is based on attraction rather than promotion; we need always maintain anonymity at the level of press, radio and films. We need guard with special care the anonymity of all N.A. Members.

  12. Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of all our traditions, ever reminding us to place principles above personalities.


THE TWELVE CONCEPTS OF NAR-ANON FAMILY GROUPS
(Just as freedom for the individual comes from the Twelve Steps and freedom for the Group springs from our Traditions,
so freedom for the service structure flourishes from the Twelve Concepts.)

  1. To fulfill our fellowship’s primary purpose, the Nar-Anon Groups have joined together to create a structure that develops, coordinates, and maintains services on behalf of Nar-Anon as a whole.

  2. The final responsibility and authority for Nar-Anon services rests with the Nar-Anon Groups.

  3. The Nar-Anon Groups delegate to the service structure - the authority necessary to fulfill the responsibilities assigned to it.

  4. Effective leadership is highly valued in Nar-Anon. Leadership qualities should be carefully considered when selecting trusted servants.

  5. For each responsibility assigned to the service structure, a single point of decision and accountability should be clearly defined.

  6. Group conscience is the spiritual means by which we invite a loving Higher Power to influence our decisions.

  7. All members of a service body bear substantial responsibility for that body’s decisions and should be allowed to fully participate in its decision-making processes.

  8. Regular, two-way communications are essential to the fulfillment of all these concepts, and to the integrity and effectiveness of our services themselves.

  9. All elements of our service structure have the responsibility to carefully consider all viewpoints in their decision-making processes.

  10. Any member of a service body can petition that body for the redress of a personal grievance, without fear of reprisal.

  11. Nar-Anon funds are used to further our primary purpose to carry the message, and must be managed responsibly.

  12. In keeping with the spiritual nature of Nar-Anon, out structure should always be one of service, never of government.
 


SERENITY PRAYER
 

God, grant me the serenity to accept
the things I cannot change,
courage to change the things I can,
and the wisdom to know the difference.